From: Tushar doctor <tushardoctor@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, May 29, 2012 at 6:01 PM
Subject: Letter written by a wife after her husband's death in an accident
Worth noting. Life is so unpredictable!
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"Few things I learnt after my husband's death:-
We always believe we will live forever. Bad things always happen to others.
Only when things hit us bang on your head you realise... Life is so
unpredictable....
My husband was an IT guy.all techie.And I am a chartered
accountant.Awesome combination you may think.
Techie guy so everything is on his laptop.his to do list. his e-bill
and his bank statements in his email. . He even maintained a folder
which said IMPWDS.wherein he stored all login id and passwords for all
his online accounts.And even his laptop had a password. Techie guy so
all the passwords were alpha-numeric with a special character not an
easy one to crack.Office policy said passwords needed to be changed
every 30 days.So every time I accessed his laptop I would realise it's
a new password again. I would simply opt for asking him 'What's the
latest password' instead of taking the strain to memorise it.
You may think me being a Chartered Accountant would means everything
is documented and filed properly. Alas many of my chartered accountant
friends would agree that the precision we follow with our office
documents and papers do not flow in to day to day home life. At office
you have be epitome of Reliability / Competent / Diligent etc but. at
home front there is always a tomorrow.
One fine morning my hubby expired in a bike accident on his way home
from office.. He was just 33.His laptop with all his data
crashed.everything on his hard disk wiped off.No folder of IMPWDS to
refer back to.His mobile with all the numbers on it was smashed.But
that was just the beginning. I realised I had lot to learn.
9 years married to one of the best human beings.with no kids.just the
two of us to fall back on..but now I stood all alone and lost.
Being chartered accountant helped in more ways than one but it was not
enough. I needed help.His saving bank accounts, his salary bank
accounts had no nominee.On his insurance his mom was the nominee and
it was almost 2 years back she had expired. but this was just a
start.. I didn't know the password to his email account where all his
e-bill came.I didn't know which expenses he paid by standing
instructions.
His office front too was not easy. His department had changed
recently.I didn't know his reporting boss name to start with.when had
he last claimed his shift allowance.his mobile reimbursement.
The house we bought with all the excitement.on a loan.thought with our
joint salary we could afford the EMI.when the home loans guys
suggested insurance on the loan.we decided the instead of paying the
premium the difference in the EMI on account of the insurance could be
used pay towards prepayment of the loan and get the tenure down.We
never thought what we would do if we have to live on a single
salary.So now there was huge EMI to look into .
I realised I was in for a long haul.
Road accident case. so everywhere I needed a Death certificate, FIR
report, Post Mortem report. For everything there were forms running
into pages.indemnity bonds.notary.surety to stand up for you.No
objections certificates from your co-heirs..
I learnt other than your house, your land . your car, your bike are
also your property... So what if you are the joint owner of the
flat.you don't become the owner just because your hubby is no more. So
what if your hubby expired in the bike accident.and you are the
nominee but if the bike is in a repairable condition .you have to get
the bike transferred in your name to claim the insurance.And that was
again not easy. the bike or car cannot be transferred in your name
without going through a set of legal documents. Getting a Succession
Certificate is another battle all together.
Then came the time you realise now you have to start changing all the
bills, assets in your name.Your gas connection, electricity meter,
your own house, your car, your investments and all sundries. And then
change all the nominations where your own investments are
concerned.And again a start of a new set of paperwork.
To say I was shaken.my whole life had just turned upside down was an
understatement.You realise you don't have time to morn and grieve for
the person with whom you spend the best years of your life. because
you are busy sorting all the paper work.
I realised then how much I took life for granted.I thought being a
chartered accountant I am undergoing so many difficulties.what would
have happened to someone who was house maker who wouldn't understand
this legal hotchpotch.
A sweet friend then told me dear this was not an end.you have no
kids.your assets will be for all who stand to claim.after my hubby's
sudden death.I realised it was time I took life more seriously. I now
needed to make a Will. I would have laughed if a few months back if he
had asked me to make one.But now life had taken a twist.
Lessons learnt this hard way were meant to be shared.After all why
should the people whom we love the most suffer after we are no
more.Sorting some paperwork before we go will at least ease some of
their grief.
1. Check all your nominations...
It's a usual practice to put a name (i.e in the first place if you
have mentioned it) and royally forget about it. Most of us have named
our parent as a nominee for investments, bank accounts opened before
marriage. We have not changed the same even years after they are no
longer there with us. Even your salary account usually has no
nomination.. Kindly check all your Nominations.
- Bank Accounts
- Fixed Deposits, NSC
- Bank Lockers
- Demat Accounts
- Insurance (Life, Bike or Car or Property)
- Investments
- PF & Pension Forms
2. Passwords..
We have passwords for practically everything. Email accounts, Bank
accounts, even for the laptop you use. What happens when your next in
kin cannot access any of these simply because they do not know your
password... Put it down on a paper.
3. Investments.
Every year for tax purpose we do investments. Do we maintain a excel
sheet about it. If so is it on the same laptop of which the password
you had not shared. Where are those physical investments hard copy.
4. Will.
Make a Will. I know you will smile even I would.had I not gone through
all what I did.It would have made my life lot easier.a lot less
paperwork.I wouldn't had to provide an indemnity bond, get it
notarised, ask surety to stand up, no objections certificates from
others...
5. Liabilities.
When you take a loan say for your house or car.Check out on all the
what ifs.what if I am not there tomorrow.what if I loose my job.Will
the EMI still be within my range.If not get an insurance on the
loan.The people left behind will not have to worry on something as
basic as their own house.
My battles have just begun...But let us at least try and make few
changes so that our loved ones would not suffer after we go.We do not
know what will happen in the future.But as the Scout motto goes: "Be
prepared "
__,_._,___
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